never seen awful statues?? I think u are forgetting all of Michelangelo’s attempts at sculpting women, the big queer
Damn, how could I forget?
Dented oranges are my favorite type of breast
Michel-I’ve never seen a naked woman-angelo
he literally just sculpted a man’s pectorals and put lumpy lemons on them
Okay to be fair, there are a shitton of Virgin Mary paintings that show Mickey wasn’t the only dude out there doing religious art who hadn’t a fucking clue what breasts were supposed to be.
Madonna Nursing the Christ Child, Robert Champin’s (c. 1375 – 26 April 1444) workshop. Tiny shoulderboobs will be a theme here, as will babies who look like they want to start a fight.
Madonna With Child, Rogier van der Weyden, c.1450. Please note that we have both tiny boob and an invisible nipple.
Mary and Child, Gerard David (1490). Even the baby isn’t buying it.
Madonna Nursing the Christ Child, Legend of the Master of the Magdalen (15th-16th century)
Galaktotrophousa, Master Ioannis (1778). Yes, there’s a boob in this picture.
And my favorite, for bonus points of “why is this even a thing”:
The Miraculous Lactation of St. Bernard, Alonso Cano (1650)
This painting depicts the spiritual nourishing of St. Bernard by the milk of Our Lady, based on this legendary mystical experience: Bernard prayed before a statue of the Madonna, asking her, “Show yourself a mother” (“Monstra te esse Matrem”). The statue came to life and and squirted milk from the breast onto the Saint’s lips.
So yeah, Michelangelo couldn’t sculpt a boob to save his goddamn life, but if he was cribbing off of other artists, he can be forgiven. At least one of them might have seen a boob and still fucked up this bad.
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